That's Racist, And You Ain't Even Know It!

If you’ve read any of my previous posts, you know that I’ve had quite a few run-ins with racism—from my youth to my present—like most people of color.  Back in 2013, I was having multiple racist encounters, one right after the other, in my profession as a teacher. I loathed those encounters, and I just wanted them to stop.  Since I don't believe in coincidences, I knew that everything happened for a reason.  

So I went to God and asked, “What are You trying to tell me?  What does all of this mean?" 

Then I had a moment of reckoning.  Instead of fighting against these occurrences, I realized I was supposed to embrace them--not condone them, but embrace the fact that I had a role to play in these situations. I now understand that part of what I’m called to do is to educate people through their racism—to be an anti-racist educator.  I have a certain calm and peace about me that doesn’t automatically go into verbal attack mode when I encounter racism.  It is my sincerest desire for people to be reflective about what they’ve said or done, to learn from it, and to grow.  I need the behavior to change more than I need to, let's say, curse somebody out.  I am in no way judging people who choose to handle these situations with the latter response, but that's not what I'm called to do.  Mind you, I’m not dealing with self-proclaimed racists.  Bless their hearts; only Jesus can save them.  I’m dealing with well-intentioned people, the willfully ignorant, who are blinded to their racist tendencies.  As King said, "Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." Those are the people with whom I work.  We’re all victims in this system of oppression, but the lasting effects are manifested in much, much different ways.  

However, before I accepted my role as an anti-racist educator, I made a video where I expressed my utmost frustration.  I was done--over it! I was washing my hands of trying to help people because it was just too much to bear.  I didn’t want to carry that cross anymore.  Yet and still, since the video, I’ve led an anti-racist training for teachers and am currently planning another, counseled a few educators, and battled a racist professor, just to name a few.  I can't keep running from my calling.  

But again, before my acceptance, I made a video. It was not scripted, and I did it with only 2-3 takes one afternoon following yet another racist experience.  I came home disgusted, opened a laptop, and started recording whatever came out.  I've held onto this video for two years, debating whether or not to make it public.  Given the current racial climate of our country and now that I've contextualized my previous experiences with race through my blog, I'm ready to put it out there, and here it is: That's Racist, And You Ain't Even Know It!